How to search conscience

One of the additions to the book of Daniel featuring in the deutero-canonical writings of the Apocrypha is the story of Susanna, falsely accused of adultery by two men whose evil advances she refuses. She is saved from condemnation to death under the Mosaic Law by the insistence of the young Daniel on the interrogation of the men separately. 

They condemn themselves by the inconsistency of their lies, although it is clear that without Daniel's intervention, she would have been executed without a hearing on the untested evidence of two men alone. Normally in that setting, the testimony of women was disregarded, and that of men alone to be relied upon. Daniel reveals the unjust and foolish nature of custom and practise, but in spite of this, such a travesty of inequality under the law can still be found in our times.

Susanna, accused and automatically condemned cries out loud to God about the false accusation, and God arouses Daniel to act and speak out with authority on her behalf. Even though he is young, his reputation for wisdom commands the attention of the crowd and leads to Susanna's acquittal.

In the Gospel story about the woman taken in adultery from John 8:1-11 (or after Luke 21:38), it is not a matter of proving her innocence, but rather how she is rescued from certain death under the same Law of Moses. To those who have put her on trial, those who have presumed the power of life and death over her, Jesus says: 

"Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her." 

And nobody can. 

He has invited them to search their consciences, and they admit to themselves that they too sin and break God's law. None of them would want to be punished for whatever their consciences accuse them of. Their honesty spares a life. Jesus will not condemn her either. 

"From now on, do not sin again." 

is all he will say.

When we're honest with God about the state of our consciences, God doesn't condemn us. These words of Jesus apply also to us, whatever we've done or failed to to. If we think of sin as causing suffering to anyone, including ourselves, it is easier to search our hearts honestly than it is to trawl through the catalogue of religious and moral rules to identify a breach. The greatest moral evil is not to care at all about the impact of our actions on others.

'Happy is the one whose transgression is forgiven, Whose sin is covered! Happy is the one to whom the Lord does not impute iniquity, in whose spirit there is no deceit!'  (Psalm 32:1)

   

Outpouring of love

The Sunday preceding Palm Sunday and Holy Week is called Passion Sunday. The liturgical colour changes from penitential purple to the red that at any other time of year distinguishes a feast celebrating a martyr of the church. From now until Good Friday the use of the colour red points to the sacrifice of Christ on the cross. Together the church is 

'... looking to Jesus, on whom our faith depends from beginning to end.' (Hebrews 12:2) 

Today's Gospel tells of Jesus being anointed by Mary the sister of Lazarus in their home at Bethany. It is an act of extravagant generosity that draws attention to her. The traitor Judas starts arguing about the appropriateness of her gesture but his indignation gets deflated by what Jesus says

“Leave her alone. She bought it so that she might keep it for the day of my burial. 

You always have the poor with you, but you do not always have me.” (John 12:7-8)

Despite references to his possible fate Jesus had been making lately, none of his disciples had taken this to heart. Here again, he tries to warn them of an approaching disaster which will try them to the limit, but this has no impact on them. 

Mary's action expresses the deep love she has for Jesus. Whatever feeling she may have had for him as a man, it was her love for what he taught, and her gratitude for having raised her brother to life is what her action expresses. Could she have anticipated how Jesus was going to interpret her deed?

Down the ages, people have expressed gratitude to God for blessings received in offering the most extravagant gifts - money, treasures, entire buildings etc, making the church wealthy on times. Some have prefered to be generous to the poor instead. Who can ultimately judge the appropriateness of their actions, but God alone, who knows the secrets of our hearts?

Another story tells of Jesus being anointed by a woman weeping penitential tears, and when his host protests about this Jesus says

“Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little."

(Luke 7:44-47)

Gratitude for the mercy of forgiveness, and thanksgiving for blessings received give prayer its vitality. If penitence leads to sober humble self-estimation, praise renews confidence and hope abundantly. These are inseparable dimensions of relationship with God.

The sign of forgiveness

In the prayer which Jesus taught his disciples to pray, the phrase 

'Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us' 

may equally be translated, 

'Forgive us our debts, as we forgive those indebted to us'. 

If anyone is caused to suffer through the misdeeds of another, something is missing in the relationship between them. We speak of being owed an apology, if we have been wronged. 

Jesus tackles the question of how much we are owed, in the parable about a heavily indebted man, released from his obligation to pay a colossal outstanding sum, who refuses to do the same for someone whose debt to him is minor in comparison. He has got away without being punished yet still seeks to punish someone else. When his master finds this out he is outraged and punishes him even more severely for his unmerciful behaviour. 

Having told this story to his disciples, Jesus issues one of his sternest warnings:

'And that is how my heavenly Father will deal with you unless you each forgive your brother from your heart.' (Matthew 18:35)

Heartfelt forgiveness is difficult to practise when the heart itself is wounded by sin. This makes it vital to keep praying to receive healing for being sinned against, as well as pardon for sin committed. We are always sinned against as well as sinners in a world of dysfunction in relation to God, as well as each other. 

It requires courage and determination to keep on facing this truth, and refusing to despair. The appeal we make to God for mercy is a lifeline anchoring us to Christ and his cross, the definitive sign of divine compassion. It is with good reason that the priest's declaration of God's pardon and absolution, and the anointing with oil for healing, are accompanied by the priest making the sign of the cross on the recipient, and made by the recipient themselves. It is usual in eastern Orthodox tradition for repetition of 'Lord have mercy' to be accompanied by crossing oneself. The simple physical action unites the mind and body with the spiritual reality. Another brief prayer associated with the making of the sign of the cross is this

'Fence me about, O Lord, with the power of the honourable and life-giving Cross, and deliver me from every evil.'
  

Honest preparation

Shrove Tuesday takes its name from the verb 'to shrive', describing the action of examining one's conscience and admitting truthfully without excuses before God, in a the company of a priest, all those things which trouble the heart are are considered wrong and sinful. The objective of the exercise is to hear the declaration of God's forgiveness from the priest, and be offered help and guidance to put one's life right in a moral and spiritual way that brings peace and restores confidence.

It's a day for diagnosis of spiritual ailments, for reassurance that healing and growth are possible, no matter how catastrophically we may believe we have failed. It's an important preparation for the penitential journey of Lent, in which sorrow and regret for the past are overcome by the struggle to overcome faults and errors that lead to estrangement from God. 

It's also a day to consider making amends, giving apologies to others affected by one's wrong-doing, making steps towards reconciliation, where this is needed. It could take a long time to complete this initiative, but recognising the need and desiring to act upon it are the first step. It's at the heart of Jesus' teaching: 
 
"Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering." (Matt 5:23-24)

"As you are going with your adversary to the magistrate, try hard to be reconciled on the way, or your adversary may drag you off to the judge, and the judge turn you over to the officer, and the officer throw you into prison." (Luke 12:58)
 
Reconciliation with God and with one another is an appeal made with vigorous passion in the writings of St Paul. In his second letter to the Corinthians  he says
 
"All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation" (2 Cor 5:18) and 

"We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God." (2 Cor 5:20).

We have to start by honestly recognising the state we're in and the need we have to make a fresh start with God.

Penitence is an expression of gratitude a result of receiving unconditional forgiveness, from the One who 'knows of what we are made' (Psalm 103:14)

Sin is more than the symptomatic thoughts, words and deeds that cause suffering, it is the very evil of suffering itself from which God lovingly longs to free his wounded, straying children. God's appeal reaches out to humankind from heart of scripture, likewise his promise  of compassion


"I have seen their ways, but I will heal them; I will guide them and restore comfort to Israel's mourners" (Isaiah 57:18)

"I will heal their waywardness and love them freely, for my anger has turned away from them." (Hosea 14:4)

Shrove Tuesday is traditionally the climax of carnival celebrations, one last celebration of indulgence before the austerities of Lenten self'denial are imposed. It's a way of concealing the true nature of the day, and it's no surprise that many carnival goers wear masks. Is this to conceal inner grief and sorrow, and hide genuine intentions? 

It's doubtful all that many people look beyond party time while it's happening, to the serious matter of accountability to God for their actions. It's not unusual to hide inner turmoil and torment behind a cheerful face, for fear of having to explain to enquirers that something's wrong. This behaviour is so common that it was written in to one of the world's earliest explanations of why human beings feel bad about things they don't get right.

"They heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden. Then the Lord God called to the man, and said to him, "Where are you?" He said, "I heard the sound of You in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid myself." (Genesis 3:8-9)

But, as St John remainds us in his first epistle

If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:8-9)